QUANTUM PHYSICS FOR SCAREDY CATS!

The first thing you need to know is that I am no scientist. Utterly useless, I am. You think I’m exaggerating? Well, my last science report at school said, “Nicola has absolutely no aptitude for science subjects.” So, I gave up. Well, I was probably planning to give up anyway, but then I certainly did, much to the relief of all concerned.

So, it’s not very easy for me to try to explain anything sciencey to you, especially something so weird and extraordinary that it actually doesn't make sense, even to scientists: quantum physics. (There's a video coming at the end of this post which I think explains it really well, but bear with me while I try... Oh, and apologies if I seem to be speaking very simply: this is for my brain's benefit, not because I think you won't understand!)

Here are some things that I do understand about quantum physics:

• It’s the science of VERY small things, smaller than atoms, smaller than I can imagine.
• These particles are called quanta (the plural of quantum).
• Even a quantum is not the smallest thing – each quantum is made of gluons, quarks, protons and electrons.
• Quanta do not behave like other particles – they follow very different rules.
• Scientists don’t fully know what those rules are.
• But they have some theories.

One theory (which I believe they have proved - and the video you'll see later seems to show how) about quanta is that they change / move when they are observed – SO, we cannot predict where one will be at any time because the act of finding it will change where it is or how fast it moves.

That is "Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle": that you cannot simultaneously know the position and speed of a quantum particle, because it moves by being observed: in other words, the act of trying to measure its position changes it.

This theory was HUGELY important because before that we had assumed that every particle’s position was a) measurable and b) governed by physical laws and all we had to do was know the position and movement of every particle and then we could know what it would do. For example, if we knew everything that would affect the way a coin was spun, we could know which way it would land.

The Uncertainty Principle tells us that we cannot know, not even logically, not in theory or practice or even if we had infinite power. Because everything changes. And it's very important in Wasted, even though (thankfully) I never mention it.

The video below explains why scientists believe this and some of what it means.

One confusing and famous consequence of quantum theory is the Schrodinger's Cat paradox, but that will have to wait till Saturday because I'm now exhausted by all this science and need to go and lie down in a darkened room. On Saturday I will attempt to explain it, so please don't go and mess things up by telling me anything about it in your comments, otherwise I may have to do something nasty to the cat.

While I go and lie down, take a look at this video. I don’t know about you, but it really helps me a) understand b) see just how weird this all is c) see why scientists are fascinated by it.

Oh, and c) it makes me very glad I’m not a scientist. But then, after all, I have no aptitude for science.

Except that I did write two books about the brain! Hooray for teachers saying I am useless...